Hi everybody. As I am writing this, the Formal Opening at Supreme Session is just hours away (Wednesday there, Tuesday here). As you know I have been wanting to be in Australia so much that I have been doing virtual tours of the land down under. Well, that's not so bad, a little harmless fun, but yesterday things really got weird. It all started when I was driving down the road in South St. Louis County.
I was feeling a bit hungry and was trying to decide where to eat. Suddenly the wind picked up and it got very dark. My head seemed to be in a fog. Big clouds moved overhead and it began to rain so I flipped on my lights and windshield wipers.
Then, sort of like something out of the Wizard of Oz, a tornado
appeared 
Needless to say I was quit concerned at this turn of
events. I drove home and made it into my house. The wind continued
to increase in intensity and suddenly the tornado was right outside my
window. It picked my house right up off the foundation and sent it high
into the air
The house was twisting and turning, furniture was flying around
like ping pong balls in the lotto machine. I don't know how long I was in
the air, but it seemed like it must have been 15-18 hours. Man, what a
storm. Then, just as suddenly as it started the storm stopped and my house
dropped like a rock and landed with a tremendous thump. I was knocked to the
floor and hit my head on a chair. I was stunned for second, and then made
my way to my wobbly feet. I felt like I had kangaroos loose in the top
paddock . . . Huh? What did I just say? Oh well, never mind. I
looked outside to see where I was at. I did not recognize anything and I
figured that I had Buckley's chance of doing so . . . What!?!?!? Now what
did I say? What is going on here? I mean Kangaroos in the paddock,
and Buckley's chance. Suddenly it hit me. I was speaking
Australian. I looked outside again. That was it, I was in
Australia! Hooray, hooray, now I can go to Supreme Session, but there is
one problem, I don't know how to get there. I stepped outside. In
the distance I saw someone floating towards me. As she got closer I
recognized her. It was "The Queen."
The Queen looked at me and said, "Oh noble stranger, you
look tired and hungry. I will therefore grant you a wish, but it must truly
be something you need."
Oh great Queen, I am a stranger in this land. Can you help me travel to Supreme Session, for that is where I truly wish to be.
"I will grant you what you need, though it may or may not be your wish. You must travel to the outback to achieve your desire."
"Okay," I said, "but how do I know which way to go?"
The Queen responded as she began to float away, "You will see a sign . . . a sign . . . a sign."
Now I knew what I must do, but not the direction I had to travel, so I just picked one and set out on my trip. I had gone just a short way when I saw 2 polar bears playing American Football
Well,
that's not the direction I need to go, so I turned 90 degrees and headed off
again. This time it was 2 polar bears playing soccer, or as it is known to
the rest of the world, football.
That's
closer, but not quite right, so I picked a third direction. This time I
had traveled a bit when I saw what appeared to be me playing football, but wait,
it was Australian Rules Football.
Hooray, I was traveling in the right direction. I continued on my
way. I began to see different objects that reminded me of Australia,
such as a man throwing a boomerang, 
a hopping kangaroo, 
and a Koala mama and her baby, 
but I was still searching for the one thing that would give me directions to the
outback. I traveled for hours and hours, staggering in the heat, tired and
hungry, wanting a sign that would tell me which way to go. I must have
gone in circles when there, incredibly, a sign was right in my face.
It seemed so clear, how could I have missed it before. Now I knew I was on
the right track. I following the sign.
Then, there it was in the distance, the outback. 
I staggered up to the door. Someone who seemed
vaguely familiar invited me in 
Once inside I was surrounded by many people who all seemed
to be tired and hungry, just as I was. 
Then a very nice lady 
brought me something to eat 
I was just about finished eating, and was contemplating getting back on the road to Supreme Session when the fog that had been surrounding my head suddenly began to clear. I began to hear a voice, at first distant, but growing in volume and intensity. It said
Ashley, Ashley, Ashley, Ashley, Ashley . . . ASHLEY!
Huh! What! I looked across the table and there was my wife, Toni. She looked at me and said, "Do you feel better now that you have eaten? You must have really been hungry because you've almost been in a daze for the last hour. I figured that you wanted to go to the Outback Steakhouse when you kept muttering "Australia" and "Outback" over and over."
I looked across the table at her. "You mean this has all been a dream. I'm not really in Australia. What about the tornado, the house being torn off its foundation and lifted into the air?"
Toni said, "I wondered why you kept saying they pronounce it Ozzie, like OZ, not Aussie, like AWE-SEE."
So there it was, I had imagined it all. The tornado, the trip to Australia, the journey into the outback. It was actually a trip to the Outback Steakhouse here in St. Louis. Still, it was nice for a moment to really believe I was Down Under looking up at the Southern Cross in the sky, and having a great time at Supreme Session. I hope everyone who is there realizes how lucky you are to be there. Enjoy your stay, and bring home a bunch of memories that you will keep always.
When we left the restaurant, night was falling. 
I was lost in my thoughts when suddenly I looked up, and there to my surprise
was a word staring me in my face that I never expected to see . . . QANTAS!
Wow! Could it really be, or was I just back in my dream world? Well,
who cares, I can pretend I am at Supreme, can't I? I looked at Toni, who
gave me a smile ad said, "Go ahead, it's your dream." I entered
the vehicle and prepared myself for the long trip to Australia. Of course,
remember that I can't fly, but that's okay. It won't be any problem.
Remember that Qantas airlines is on strike, so I'm taking the Qantas Bus :)
To get back to the Supreme Diary page, click on the Bus.